If a particular ancestor is highlighted, then you need to explore your personal associations with that person. For example, your great-aunt could have been renowned for her psychic abilities, so a dream about her might represent that intuitive tendency in you. Family scenes in your dream may represent feelings of security and unity, or a desire for this in your waking life. The appearance of your whole family together in a dream can indicate that you are yearning for the security and togetherness of childhood and home. On the other hand, if you dream that you see your family but are not present among them or are ignored by them, perhaps you feel emotionally distant from them at present. The appearance or mention of your family name in dreamland calls attention to your heritage or family situation.
If family planning is a feature of your dream, this suggests the need to take responsibility for your future. A family room suggests congeniality. Members of the extended family (such as cousins, aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews) usually appear in a dream as an aspect of yourself relevant to the person you dreamed about. For example, if your cousin is shy in waking life, his appearance in a dream may refer to the inhibited part of yourself.
To dream of a family tree may indicate your true spiritual heritage, providing you with a record of your origins and your place in the overall scheme of things; alternatively, if you believe in reincarnation, particularly genetic reincarnation, it may represent your own past lives.
If you are finding it difficult to analyze the meaning of your dream, it may be that your unconscious has cast a feminine or masculine archetype in the role of the relation. To determine if this is the case, ask yourself if your dream uncle has more in common with the archetypal wise old man than your father’s brother, or if your dream niece has more in common with the archetypal amazon or huntress.... The Element Encyclopedia
It is common to have disturbing dreams for some period afterwards; or not be able to dream about the husband (or wife) at all; or to see the partner in the distance but not get near. In accepting the death, meeting any feelings of loss, grief, anger and continuing love, the dream may become as below.
The example both shows the resolution of the loss, but also the paradox felt at realising the meeting was an inner reality. Example: ‘A couple of months ago as I was waking I felt my husband’s arm across me and most realistically experienced my hand wrapping around his arm and turning towards him (which I had done so often in his lifetime) and saying “1 thought you had died. Thank God you have not.” Then I awoke alone and terribly shaken’ (Mrs I).
A critic might say this is only a dream in which a lonely woman is replaying memories of her dead husband’s presence for her own comfort—thus her disappointment on being disillusioned. Whatever our opinion, the woman has within her such memories to replay. These are reality.
The inner reality is of what experience was left within her from the relationship. Her challenge is whether she can meet this treasure with its share of pain, and draw out of it the essence which enriches her own being. That is the spiritual life of her husband.
The aliveness’ of her husband in that sense is also social, because many other people share memories of him. What arises in their own lives from such memories is the observable influence of the now dead person.
But the dead also touch us more mysteriously, as in the next example. Example: In a recent news programme on television, a man who survived a Japanese prisoner of war camp in Singapore had been given a photograph of children by a dying soldier he did not know.
The man had asked him to tell his family of his death, but did not give his name.
The photograph was kept for 40 odd years, the man still wanting to complete his promise but not knowing how. One night he dreamt he was told the man’s name. Enquiries soon found the family of the man, who had an identical photograph. See husband under family. ... A Guide to Dreams and Sleep Experiences
For example, to dream of your mother dying could represent the death of your own motherly nature. Perhaps you should try to be more caring and maternal, or perhaps something or someone should be nurtured instead of ignored. Alternatively, you may be expressing hidden feelings for that person. Do you secretly resent or wish to be independent of him or her? Such dreams may also represent a positive or negative change in your relationship or attitude toward that particular person. Yet another interpretation suggests that dreams of being prostrate with grief at your father’s or mother’s funeral can be an emotional dress rehearsal staged by your unconscious to prepare you for the devastation you may feel when your parent really does die. Such dreams tend to be more common in women, especially concerning the death of a partner, as statistically women live longer than men.
Dreaming of a relative or partner who is dead in waking life is, not surprisingly, quite common. After all, that person may have played a big part in your life, and their influence and memories are still very much alive in you. It is not unusual to have disturbing dreams for some period after the death of a loved one; it is equally common not to be able to dream about the husband or wife at all, or to see the partner in the distance but be unable to get any nearer. Such dreams of dead people are expressive of attempts by your dreaming mind to help you make the transition from external reality to internal memories, or to deal with feelings, guilt or anger in connection with the person who died. See also SPIRITS AND GHOSTS.... The Element Encyclopedia
A woman is the intuitive, creative part of self. Whatever qualities, characteristics, and lessons that you associate with that person you may be learning about again. Pay attention.... The Dream Books Symbols
If a dream contains relatives who are deceased it can be showing you a generational curse or blessing that originates with that particular relative.
If the dead relative is dripping with oil, radiant, and joyous it symbolizes eternal life, 1 Jn. 3:9 NLT... Christian Dream Symbols
If the family is very sad expect some adverse reactions in your financial structure.... Tryskelion Dream Interpretation
If our mother is unable to develop a feeling contact with us, we may lack the confidence to meet our emotions.
Our maturation as a man or woman calls us in some way to meet and integrate our childhood desire, which includes sexual desire for our parent of the opposite sex, and rivalry with, mingled with dependence on, the parent of the same sex. Even a missing parent, the mother or father who died or left, is a potent figure internally.
An absence of a father’s or mother’s love or presence can be as traumatic as any powerfully injuring event. Our parents in our dreams are the image (full of power and feeling) of the formative forces and experiences of our identity. They are the ground, the soil, the bloody carnage, out of which our sense of self emerged. But our identity cannot gain any real independence while still dominated by these internal forces of our creation. Heraclitus said we cannot swim in the same river twice; attempting to repeat or compete with the vinues of a parent is a misapprehension of the true nature of our own personality. Sec individuation.
Family group: The whole background of experience which makes up our values and views. This background is made up of thousands of different obvious and subtle things such as social status; amount of books in the home; how parents feel about themselves; how they relate to life outside the family; whether dominant roles are encouraged; what nationality parents are; what unconscious social attitudes surround the family (i.e. the master and servant, or dominating employer and subservient employee, roles which typified England at the turn of the century still colour many attitudes in the UK). Simply put, it is our internal ‘family’ of urges and values; the overall feeling tone of our family life—security, domination, whatever it was, the unconscious coping patterns of the family.
Parents together in dream: our general wisdom, background of information and experience from which we make important decisions or gain intuitive insights. Parents also depict the rules and often irrational disciplinary codes we learnt as a child which still speak to us from within, and perhaps pass on to our own children without reassessment. These include everything from ‘Don’t speak with your mouth full’ to the unspoken Masturbation is unholy/
Dead parent in dream: the beginning of independence from parent; repression of the emotions they engendered in us, our emotions regarding our parent’s death; feelings about death. See dead people dreams.
Example: ‘My father was giving me and another woman some medicine. Something was being forced on us. I started to hit and punch him in the genitals and, when he was facing the other way, in the backside. I seemed to be just the right height to do this and I had a very angry feeling that I wanted to hurt him as he had hurt me’ (Audrey V). Hurting, burying , killing parent: in the example Audrey’s height shows her as a child. She is releasing anger about the attitudes and situations her father forced down her throat’.
To be free of the introverted restraints and ready made values gathered from our parents, at some time in our growth we may kill or bury them. Although some people arc shocked by such dreams, they are healthy signs of emerging independence. Old myths of killing the chief so the tribe can have a new leader depict this process. When father or mother are dead’ in our dream, we can inherit all the power gained from whatever was positive in the relationship. Seeing parent drunk, incapable, foolish: another means of gaining independence from internalised values or stultifying drives to ‘honour’ or admire father or mother.
Generally positive: authority; ability in the external world; family or social conventions, how we relate to the ‘doer’ in us; physical strength and protectiveness; the will to be. Generally negative: introvened aggression; dominance by fear of other people’s authority, uncaring sexual drive; feelings of not being loved. See father under archetypes; man.
Generally positive: feelings; ability in relationships; uniting spirit of family; how we relate to feelings in a relationship; strength to give of self and nunure; intuition. Generally negative: will based on irrational likes and dislikes; opinion generated by anxiety or jealousy; domination by emotions; lack of bonding. See Great Mother under archetypes; woman.
siblings and children
Whether brother, sister, daughter or son (see below in this entry), the most general use in our dreams is to depict an aspect of ourself. However it is almost universal to believe with great conviction that our dream is about the person in our dream.
A mother seeing a son die in her dream often goes through great anxiety because there lurks in her a sense of it being a precognitive dream. Vinually everyone at some time dreams about members of their close family dying or being killed—lots of mothers dream this, and their children live till 80. But occasionally children do die. Is the dream then precognitive, or is it coincidental?
Example: ‘I was walking along a rather dusty track carrying my younger son who would be around 10 months old and I was feeling rather tired. Suddenly I met a man who stopped to talk to me and commented I looked rather weary carrying the baby. He said, come with me and look over this wall and you will see such a sight that will gladden your hean. By standing on tiptoe I could just see over the wall and the sight I beheld took my breath away, it was so beautiful’ (Johan E). Here Johan’s son depicts the weight of responsibility she feels.
The beauty is her own resources of strength in motherhood.
Example: ‘I have just given binh to twins and they lay on the floor. We started to care for them. My mother took them to the doctor for his advice while I went to see my married sister who has two children. I met them there with the twins so that my sister could give her opinion on the babies. She had recent experience of childbirth and could tell us if the babies were good specimens’ (Miss E). Miss E has no children of her own, so she is uncertain of her own capacity to have and raise them.
The mother depicts her own mothering abilities, which seek confidence from an authority figure. Her sister is her own nearest experience of childbirth. So out of what she has leamt from observing her sister, she is assessing her own qualities.
Most often the family member depicts the qualities in ourself which we feel are part of the character of the person dreamt of. So the passionate one in the family would depict our passions; the intellectual one our own mind, the anxious one our hesitations. Use the questions in dream processing to define this. Having done this, can you observe what the dream depicts? For Miss E it would be questions regarding motherhood.
Example: ‘My daughter told me the only positive part of my work in a helping profession was with a woman who had turned from it to religion. There followed a long and powerful interchange in which I said she had as yet no mind of her own. She was dominated by her mother’s anxiety, and the medical rationalism of her training. When she had dared to step beyond her own anxieties to integrate the lessons of her own life, then I would listen again’ (Desmond S). Desmond was divorced and struggling with his own pain and guilt about leaving his daughter while still a teenager. His daughter depicts this conflict between his feelings and his rational self.
Oneself, or the denied pan of self, meeting whatever is met in the dream; feelings of kinship; sense of rivalry, feelings about a brother. Woman’s dream, younger brother: outgoing but vulnerable self; rivalry. Woman’s dream, older brother, authority, one’s capable outgoing self. Man’s dream, younger brother: vulnerable feelings; oneself at that age. Man’s dream, older brother: experience; authority, feelings of persecution. See boy; man. Idioms: big brother, brothers in arms; blood brother.
Feeling self, or the lesser expressed pan of self; rival; feelings about a sister. Man s dream, younger sister: vulnerable emotions; rival for love of parents. Man’s dream, older sister: capable feeling self; feelings of persecution. Woman’s dream , younger sister: one’s experiences at that age; vulnerable feelings, rival for parents’ love. Woman’s dream, older sister: capable feeling self. See girl; woman. Idioms: sisters under the skin.
One’s relationship with the daughter, the daughter, or son, can represent what happens in a marnage between husband and wife.
The child is what has arisen from the bonding, however momentary, of two people. In dreams the child therefore is sometimes used to depict how the relationship is faring. So a sick daughter might show the feelings in the relationship being ‘ill’.
In a mother’s dream: often feelings of suppon or companionship; feelings of not being alone in the area of emotional bonds; or one’s feeling area; responsibility; the ties of parenthood; oneself at that age; one’s own urges, difficulties, hurts, which may still be operative. Also a comparison; the mother might see the daughter’s youth, opportunity, and have feelings about that. So the daughter may represent her sense of lost opportunity and youth—even envy, competition in getting the desire of a man.
In a father’s dream: one’s feeling self, the feelings or difficulties about the relationship with daughter; the struggles one’s own feeling self goes through to mature, how the sexual feelings are dealt with in a family—occurs especially when she starts courting; sister, parental responsibility; one’s wife when younger. Someone else’s daughter: feelings about one’s own daughter, feelings about younger women.
Example: 1 am standing outside a supermarket with heavy bags wearing my mac, though the sun is warm. My daughter and two friends are playing music and everyone stops to listen. I start to wnte a song for them, but they pack up and go on a bus whilst I am still writing. I am left alone at the bus stop with my heavy burden of shopping, feeling incredibly unwanted’ (Mrs F). Such dreams of the daughter becoming independent can occur as soon as the child starts school, persisting until the mother finds a new attitude. See child; woman.
Extroverted self; desires connected with self expression; feelings connected with son; parental responsibility. Mother’s dream: one’s ambitions; potential, hopes; your marriage—see example.
Example: ‘My wife and I were walking out in the countryside. I looked around suddenly and saw my four-year-old son near a hole. He fell in and I raced back.
The hole was narrow but very deep. I could see water at the bottom but no sign of my son. I didn’t know whether I could leap down and save him or whether it was too narrow. Then somehow he was out. His heart was just beating’ (Richard H). Richard had argued with his wife in such a way he feared the stability of their marriage.
The son represents what they had created together —a child, a marriage.
The marriage survived, as his dream self-assessed it would. Death of son: a mother often kills off her son in her dreams as she sees him make moves towards independence. This can happen from the first day of school on. Example: T am on a very high bridge over an extremely wide and deep river with steep banks. My son does a double somersault over the railing, falls into the water. I think he is showing off. I am unable to save him. My son is 18 and has staned a structural engineering course at university’ (Joyce H).
The showing-off suggests Joyce feels her son is doing daring things with his life, and the relationship in its old form dies.
Father’s dream: yourself at that age; what qualities you see in your son; your own possibilities, envy of youth and opportunities; nvalry. Someone else’s son: feelings about one’s own son; feelings about younger men. Dead son: see dead people dreams. Sec boy. See also man; first example in falling.
Depicts how you see the relationship with your wife; your relationship with your sexuality; sexual and emotional desire and pleasure; how you relate to intimacy in body, mind and spirit; your feeling, intuitive nature; habits of relationship developed with one’s mother. Example: ‘My wife was trying to get me out of her life, and out of the house. It was as if she were attempting to push me into a feeling of tension and rejection which would make me leave’ (David P). Out of childhood experience, in which his mother repeatedly threatened to give him away, David was finding it difficult to commit himself emotionally to his wife. In the dream his wife represents these feelings, so he sees her—his anxiety and pain —pushing him to break up the marriage.
Example: I was standing with my wife at the end of the garden of the house I lived in as a child. We were looking over the fence to the rising meadow beyond. She said, “Look at that bird in the tree there.” On our right, in a small ash tree, an enormous owl perched. It was at least 4 feet high, the biggest bird I have ever seen. I recognised it in the dream as a greater hooded owl, which was not native to our country. I was so excited I ran into the house to telephone someone— zoo, police, newspapers?—to tell them about the bird. I cannot remember contacting anyone, but felt the bird was there in some way to meet me. Also it was hungry and looking at next door’s bantams. So I wondered what I could give it to eat’ (David P). This shows the positive side of David’s relationship with his wife.
The garden is the boundanes which arose from his childhood. But he is growing—the garden— and looking beyond them in connection with his marnage.
The amazing bird is the deep feelings he touches because he has a mate, like any other natural creature. Out of his mating he becomes aware of drives to build a home—nest—and give himself to his mate. These are natural and are a pan of his unconscious or spiritual nature.
The bird is a hooded owl which can see in the dark—the unconscious—because David is realising things he had never seen’ before.
The bird is masked, meaning putting the ego aside, which is a necessity for touching the wider dimension of life or the unconscious.
The hunger of the bird shows an intimate detail of what David has learnt from his wife. She had been working as a waitress and bringing home pieces of chicken for him, saved from her own meal.
The spiritual side of David wants to develop this quality of selfgiving, which his wife’s love had helped him see.
Example: ‘1 have been a widower since January 1979, having married in October 1941. I continually dream I am in London where my business was. I am walking the streets with my wife and suddenly I see her ahead of me in a yellow raincoat and hat. I call her and try to catch up, but suddenly she vanishes. In spite of calling and searching I cannot find her’ (Douglas G). This is a common theme dreamt by widowers or widows, disappearance of spouse. Douglas has ‘lost’ his wife. His dream shows the paradox of love after death of panner. His love is still there, years after her death. He is possibly still trying to love his wife as an externally real person. so his feelings can make no connection.
To meet what actually remains of his wife, within himself, he would need to face his own internal grieving, emotions, and all the feelings, memories, angers and beauty which make up the living remains of his wife within him. ... A Guide to Dreams and Sleep Experiences
According to Freud, a symbol for secrets.... Little Giant Encyclopedia
Psychologically the struggle for individuality should take place within the safety of the family unit. This, however, docs not always happen. In dreams we are able to ‘manipulate’ the images of our family members, so that we can work through our difficulties without harming anyone else (It is interesting to note that one person working on his own dreams can have a profound noticeable cffcct on the interactions and unconscious bondings between other members of his family). Almost all of the problems we encounter in life are reflected within the family, so in times of sUess we will dream of previous problems and difficulties that the family has experienced.
The Spiritual Triangle.
A group in which we feel safe.
Since relationships in the family- are so important, dreams containing family members can have extra significance. Some typical dreams are:
A man’s mother being transformed into another woman
A man’s first closc relationship with a woman is with his mother. Depending on the circumstances of the dream, such a transformation can be either positive or negative. It can be a sign of growth for him to realise, through dream, that he can let mother go. This transformation indicates some change in his perception of women (sec Airima).
A woman’s father, brother or lover turning into someone else Similarly, a woman’s first relationship with the male is usually with her father. She must learn to walk away from that relationship in order to progress onto fuller relationships. When she can handle her Animus (See Introduction), she is ready for that transformation.
A man’s brother or a woman’s sister appearing in a dream often represents the Shadow (See Introduction). Often it is easier to project the negative side of our personalities onto members of the family.
If this projection is allowed to continue, it can cause difficulty with family relationships in later life. Often the solution will present itself in dreams to enable us to come to terms with our own projections. “fhe pattern of aggressions between familv members is fairly typical, but oddly is often easier to work through in dreams than in everyday life.
Dreams about the family figure so prominently because most of the conflicts and problems in life are experienced first within that environment.
It is as though a pattern is laid down which, until it is broken willingly, will continue to appear.
Confusion of family members e.g. mother’s face on father’s body suggests that we may be having problems in deciding which parent is most important to us. Family members suffering from injury or trauma or appearing to be distorted in some way may reflect the dreamer’s fear for, or about, that person.
A family member continually appearing in dreams or, conversely, not appearing when expected The relationship with that person (or the dreamer’s concept of that person) needs to be better understood.
Dreaming of an incestuous relationship may indicate that the dreamer has become obsessed in some way with the other person.
The dream has occurred in order to highlight either the importance or the potential danger - of such a relationship.
Dreamer’s parents crushing the dreamer and thus forcing rebellion. This suggests that the dreamer needs to break away from learnt childhood behaviour and develop as an individual.
Dreaming of a parent’s death can also have the same significance. When a parent appears in our own environment, we will have learnt to change roles within the parent/child relationship and perhaps will accept our parents as friends. Parents behaving inappropriately can indicate our need to recognise that they are only human, and not as perfcct as we had first perceived.
Dreaming of rivalry with one parent When a child is first born, it moves through extreme self- involvement to an exclusive relationship, usually with mother. Onlv later docs he or she becomc aware of the need for a different relationship with a third person. Often this relationship causes the child to question his or her own validity as a person. When this question is not resolved successfully it may persist in the dream image of conflict with a parent.
Dreaming of conflict between a loved one and a member of one’s family The dreamer has not fully differentiated between his needs and desire for each person. Learning how to love outside the family is a sign of maturity.
The figure of a family member intruding in dreams suggests that family loyalties can get in the way within the dreamer’s everyday life. Rivalry between siblings in dreams usually harks back to a feeling of insecurity and doubt, possibly as to whether we are loved enough within the family framework.
Individual members and then- position within the family can symbolise the various archetypes. Thus, father can represent the masculine principle and authority; whereas mother represents the nurturing, protective principle. Brother As already stated, a brother can represent both feelings of kinship and of rivalry. In a man’s dream an older brother can represent experience and authority, while a younger brother suggests vulnerability and possibly lack of maturity. In a woman’s dream, a younger brother can represent a sense of rivalry, but also of vulnerability; whether her own or her brother’s.
An older brother can signify her extrovert self.
Daughter When the relationship with a daughter is highlighted in dreams, it often represents the outcome of the relationship between husband and wife. In a woman’s dream, the relationship with the daughter usually suggests a mutually supportive one although rivalry and jealousy can arise and needs to be dealt with. Sometimes this can safely be done in dreams. In a man’s dream his daughter may represent his fears and doubts about his own ability to handle his vulnerability.
Extended family (such as cousins, aunts, uncles)
Members of the extended family usually appear in dreams either as themselves, or as typifying various parts of ourselves which arc recognisible.
Father If the relationship with father has been successful in waking life, the image of father in dreams will be a positive one. Father represents authority and the conventional forms of law and order. In a man’s life father becomes a role model, whether appropriate or not.
It is often only when the individual realises that he is not being true to his own nature that dreams can point the way to a more successful life. In a woman’s life, father is the ‘pattern’ on whom she bases all later relationships. When she appreciates that she longer need use this pattern. she is often able to work out in dreams a more appropriate way to have a mature relationship.
If the relationship with father has been a difficult or negative one, there mav be some resistance to resolving the various conflicts which will have arisen. Often this can be accomplished in dreams. Grandparents Grandparents appearing in dreams can highlight our attitude to them, but also to the traditions and beliefs handed down by them. It could be said that grandparents do not know whether they have clone a good job of raising their children until their sins and daughters have children of their own.
Husband/Live in partner
Crucial within the husband/wife relationship are the wife’s feelings about her own sexuality and intimacy of body, mind and spirit. Her view of herself will have been formed by her connection with her father, and any subsequent partnering will be coloured by that attachment.
If her doubts and fears about validity are not properly expressed, they will surface in dreams about the loss, or death, of her husband. They may also be projected onto other women’s husbands.
Mother A child’s relationship with mother is pivotal in its development. Largely it is the first relationship which the child develops, and should be perceived by the child as a nurturing, caring one.
If this does not happen, fears and doubts may arise. In a man’s life this may result in continually developing dependent relationships with older women, or denying his right to a relationship completely. In a woman’s life, her relationship with her mother will colour all other relationships. She may find herself pushed into nurturing the needy male, or in forming relationships with both men and women which do not satisfv her basic needs. There arc many ways through dreams of working through relationships with mother, and much can be gained by daring to take this step. Provided one has come to terms with this relationship, much material and spiritual success can be achieved.
Sister The sister in dreams usually represents the feeling side of ourselves. VVe have the ability to make links with that side of ourselves through being able to understand our sister’s personality. In a man’s dream if she is older, the sister can represent the potential for persecution, but also of caring.
If she is younger then she can epitomise the more vulnerable side of him. In a woman’s dream if the sister is younger, she can represent rivalry.
If older she stands for capability. Son The son in dreams can signify the dreamer’s need for self- expression and for extroversion. He can also signify parental responsibility. In a mother’s dream he may represent one’s ambitions, hope and potential. In a father’s dream he can highlight unfulfilled hopes and dreams. Wife/Live in partner The wife/husband relationship is based on how the man perceives himself to be.
If he has previously formed a good, if not successful relationship with his mother, he will attempt to prove himself a good husband through his dreams. He will experience potential loss and death of his partner in the same way as he experienced the ‘loss’ of his mother.... Ten Thousand Dream Dictionary
If the family is very sad expect some adverse reactions in your financial structure.... Encyclopedia of Dreams
If you dream of a family member can literally be that you are processing the details of your recent interactions with a particular relative, or you are beginning to disidentify with your family mythology as you begin to autonomize and discover your own beliefs and attitudes. Also, because as every character in your dream is a reflection of you, consider the qualities and attributes you ascribe to this relative and realize that you are grappling with this aspect of yourself. See Father, Mother, Sister, Brother, Uncle, Aunt, Grandfather and Grandmother.... Strangest Dream Explanations
It is as though a pattern is laid down which, until it is broken willingly, will continue to appear. Individual members and their position within the family can also symbolize the various archetypes – father can represent the masculine principle and authority, whereas mother represents the nurturing, protective principle.
For ease of reference the relevance of each figure in men’s and women’s dreams is included under each heading. Because we have had an intimate connection with members of the family they become easy targets for projection as dream images. We do have to decide whether they are in our dreams as themselves or whether they are there in a symbolic capacity.... Dream Meanings of Versatile
For instance he may dream of his mother turning into his boss. This suggests he may have certain expectations as to how he should be treated. It can be a sign of growth for him to realize, through dreams, that he can let mother go.
A woman’s father, brother or lover turning into someone else similarly, a woman’s first relationship with the male is usually with her father or father figure. She must learn to walk away from that relationship in order to progress onto fuller relationships. When she can handle her animus she is ready for that transformation.
A man’s brother or a woman’s sister appearing in a dream this often represents the shadow. Often it is easier to project the negative side of our personalities onto members of the family.
If this projection is allowed to continue, and not understood, it can cause difficulty with family relationships. Often the solution will present itself in dreams to enable us to come to terms with our own projections.
The pattern of aggressions between family members is fairly typical, but oddly is often easier to work through in dreams than in everyday life. Confusion of family members (e.G. Mother’s face on father’s body) this suggests that we may be having problems in deciding which parent or person is most important to us. Family members suffering from injury or trauma or appearing to be distorted in some way may reflect our fear for, or about, that person.
A family member continually appearing in dreams or, conversely, not appearing when expected shows that the relationship with that person (or our concept of them) needs to be better understood.
Dreaming of an incestuous relationship may indicate that we have become obsessed in some way with the other person. We are searching for integration of their qualities within ourselves. Parents crushing us and thus forcing rebellion this suggests that we need to break away from learnt childhood behaviour and develop as an individual.
Dreaming of a parent’s death can also have the same significance. When a parent appears in our own environment, we will have learnt to change roles within the parent / child relationship and perhaps will accept our parents as friends. Parents behaving inappropriately in dreams can indicate our need to recognize that they are only human, and not as perfect as we had first perceived. In tribal societies the rite of passage between childhood and adulthood is clearly marked, by initiation. Rivalry with one or both parents is highlighted in dreams when such a transformation is not properly handled and our feelings and emotions have not been given due validity.
Dreaming of conflict between a loved one and a member of our family this shows we have not fully differentiated between our needs and desire for each person. Learning how to love outside the family is a sign of maturity.
The figure of a family member intruding in dreams suggests that family loyalties can get in the way within our everyday life. Rivalry between siblings in dreams usually harks back to a feeling of insecurity and doubt, possibly as to whether we are loved enough within the family framework.
Dreaming of being adopted suggests that we feel out of place and in some way different to other members of the family. This dream often occurs as teenagers are growing towards maturity.
Dreaming of having any family member e.G.
A brother – when we do not have one in waking life denotes our search for completion and ‘missing’ parts of our personality.... Dream Meanings of Versatile
If family members behave very differently in a dream than they do in real life, or if unexpected things happen when you are with your dream family, the dream is probably a way of releasing your anxiety about real-life family issues.
For instance, if you dream of a family member trying to hurt or kill you, it reflects a real-life concern about this person. They are acting in a way that hurts you, or threatens your emotional happiness. Also see “Father”, “Mother” and “Relatives”... My Dream Interpretation
If you fight with family it means you are dragging internal conflicts that affect your life. But if the relationship is good it means that you seek harmony.... The Big Dictionary of Dreams
If the dream does not seem connected to our actual family, then it could relate to our inner “family,” the different aspects of our own psyche.... Dream Symbols in The Dream Encyclopedia
Whilst whole schools of family therapy have been developed to help address the issues that emerge within a family context, it is worthwhile looking at one theory of a child’s development into an adult as it sheds much light on dreams about the family. This is Jung’s theory of the process of ‘individuation’, one of his most interesting and important theories. In short, individuation refers to the processes involved in becoming a self-aware and independent human being. The area of being to which we refer when we say ‘I’ or ‘me’ is our sense of self, which Jung calls the ego. A vital part of the process of individuation is to meet and integrate, or become independent of, your childhood patterns. This includes desire for the love of the parent of the opposite sex, rivalry mingled with dependence with the parent of the same sex, and the move away from total dependence on both parents.
An absence of a father’s or mother’s love can be especially traumatic, as parents are the soil out of which your sense of self must emerge. And even if your parents are no longer alive or you never had a relationship with them, their impact on your psyche can be just as profound. Without a doubt, parents are powerful, emotive figures in dreams but a person’s identity cannot gain any real independence while still dominated by these internal forces. Psychologically, this struggle for individuality should take place within the safety of the family unit.
Unfortunately this does not always happen and in dreams, images of family members may be manipulated so that issues and conflicts that have been unresolved during Jung’s process of individuation can be worked out.
Family dreams are so common because most of the conflicts and problems in your waking life are experienced first within a psychological environment laid down by your family. It is as if a pattern has been imprinted that will continue to appear until it is broken willingly. The way you were brought up has such a profound effect on your psychological health that any dream you have of family members will probably have a unique and highly specific meaning to you, depending on what your family means to you, your own experience of family life and other related attitudes. Because there is such variety here, you will need first to define your present relationship and feelings about the member of your family that features in the dream.
Individual family members can represent the various archetypes in your dreams. For example, the father can represent the masculine principle of authority and discipline, whilst the mother represents the feminine principle of nurturing and protection. In many instances, dreams featuring your family members can be reassuring. They may give you confidence and guidance, as well as a feeling that you are supported and loved. On the other hand, they may also highlight current or longterm problems within your family or personal relationships. Because they can replicate values, attitudes and emotional or social responses towards living that you have absorbed from your family, all future relationships outside the family are influenced in some way by the ones you first develop within your family. In times of stress, therefore, your dreams might use scenarios involving family members to try and put things right or reveal and confirm the conflict.
Bear in mind that each dream about a family member must be considered in context, and what the idea of a family means to you may not mean the same to another person. For example, Western concepts such as individuation, sibling rivalry or Freud’s Oedipus complex would make no sense in those cultures where an uncle or grandparent is considered no less significant than mothers or fathers. See also RELATIONSHIPS.... The Element Encyclopedia
If the family dream is stressful, however, your dreaming mind may have conjured up images of real or imagined family arguments, disagreements, tensions and grudges to highlight and bring to your attention those unresolved tensions associated with your family life that are still holding you back in your waking life; for example, sibling rivalry or lack of respect for authority or the parent figure. Alternatively if your family life is healthy and happy, and you still have dreams in which family arguments occur, your dreaming mind may conjure up such images to highlight possible feelings of insecurity; perhaps you feel that you are failing to live up to the standards and expectations of your relatives.... The Element Encyclopedia
If one finds himself unwillingly giving family support or alimony to his wife in a dream, it means hypocrisy, or that he is nearing his death.... Islamic Dream Interpretation
If the home itself, is in a dilapidated condition and general neglect, this then is an omen that you will soon hear of the death of a close relative or a very dear friend.
If you go home and find everything much the same as it was and you feel and express joy in the dream you will find love and joy in your present home.... Encyclopedia of Dreams
If he mistreats and upbraids you for unfaithfulness, you will hold his regard and confidence, but other worries will ensue and you are warned to be more discreet in receiving attention from men.
If you see him dead, disappointment and sorrow will envelop you.
To see him pale and careworn, sickness will tax you heavily, as some of the family will linger in bed for a time.
To see him gay and handsome, your home will be filled with happiness and bright prospects will be yours.
If he is sick, you will be mistreated by him and he will be unfaithful.
To dream that he is in love with another woman, he will soon tire of his present surroundings and seek pleasure elsewhere.
To be in love with another woman’s husband in your dreams, denotes that you are not happily married, or that you are not happy unmarried, but the chances for happiness are doubtful.
For an unmarried woman to dream that she has a husband, denotes that she is wanting in the graces which men most admire.
To see your husband depart from you, and as he recedes from you he grows larger, inharmonious surroundings will prevent immediate congeniality.
If disagreeable conclusions are avoided, harmony will be reinstated.
For a woman to dream she sees her husband in a compromising position with an unsuspected party, denotes she will have trouble through the indiscretion of friends.
If she dreams that he is killed while with another woman, and a scandal ensues, she will be in danger of separating from her husband or losing property. Unfavorable conditions follow this dream, though the evil is often exaggerated. ... Ten Thousand Dream Interpretation
Example: ‘My recurring dream—some disaster is happening. I try to contact the police or my husband. Can never contact either. I try ringing 999 again and again and can feel terror, and sometimes dreadful anger or complete panic. I cry, I scream and shout and never get through! Recently I have stopped trying to contact my husband. I managed once to reach him but he said he was too busy and I would have to deal with it myself. I woke in a furious temper with him and kicked him while he was still asleep’ (Mrs GS).
The husband here depicts Mrs S’s feelings of not being able to get through’ to her man. This is a common female dream theme, possibly arising from the husband not daring to express emotion or meet his panner with his own feelings.
For Mrs S this is an emergency. Although the dream dramatises it, there is still real frustration, anger, and a break in marital communications.
Example: There were three of us. My husband, a male friend and 1, all nding small white enamel bikes. My husband proceeded slowly, first, with his back to us. Then my friend followed. Suddenly my friend ahead of me turned and gazed fully at me. He gave a glonous smile which lit up the whole of his face. I felt a great sense of well-being surge through me’ (Joan B).
The triangle: the example shows typical flow of feeling towards another male.
The other male here depicts
Joan’s desire to be attractive to other men. This is a danger signal unless one fully acknowledges ihe impulse.
Example: ‘I was with my husband and our three children. About 2 or 3 yards to our right stood my husband’s first wife —she died about a year before I first met him. I remember feeling she no longer minded me being with him, so I put my arms around him from the back, and felt more secure and comfortable with him’ (Mrs NS).
The first wife: the dreamer is now feeling easier about her husband’s first relationship.
The first wife represents her sense of competing for her husband’s affections, even though his ‘first woman’ was dead.
Example: ‘My dead husband came into my bedroom and got into bed with me to make love to me. I was not afraid. But owing to his sexual appetites during my married life with him I was horrified, and resisted him with all my might. On waking I felt weak and exhausted.
The last time he came to me I responded to him and he never came back again. This happened three times.
The last time I don’t think it was a dream. I was not asleep. I think it was his ghost’ (GL). Dead husband: in any experience of an apparently psychic nature, we must always remember the unconscious is a great dramatist. It can create the drama of a dream in moments. In doing so it makes our inner feelings into apparently real people and objects outside us. While asleep we lightly dismiss this amazing process as a dream’. When it happens while our eyes are open or we are near waking, for some reason we call it a ghost or psychic event. Yet the dream process is obviously capable of creating total body sensations, emotions, full visual impressions, vocalisation—what else is a dream? On the other hand, the dream process is not dealing in pointless imaginations. Many women tend to believe they have little sexual drive, so it is easier for GL to see her drive in the form of her husband. But of course, her husband may also depict how she felt about sex in connection with his ‘sexual appetites’.
It is a general rule, however, that our dream process will dramatise into a past life, or a psychic’ experience, emotions linked with trauma or sexual drive which we find difficult to meet in the present.
Example: ‘I dreamt many times I lost my husband, such as not being able to find the car park where he was waiting, and seeing him go off in the distance. I wake in a panic to find him next to me in bed. These dreams persisted, and then he died quite suddenly. He was perfectly healthy at the time of the dreams and I wonder if it was a premonition of me really losing him’ (Mrs AD). Cannot find husband: many middle aged women dream of ‘losing’ their husband while out with him, perhaps shopping, or walking in a town somewhere. Sometimes the dream ponrays him actually killed. Mrs AD wonders if her dream was a premonition.
It is more likely a form of practising the loss, so it does not come as such a shock.
The greatest shocks occur when we have never even considered the event—such as a young child losing its mother, an event it has never practised, not even in fantasy, so has no inbuilt shock absorbers. As most of us know, men tend to die before women, and this information is in the mind of middle-aged married women. Mrs AD may have unconsciously observed slight changes in her husband’s body and behaviour, and therefore readied herself.
Other woman’s husband: one’s own husband, feelings about that man, desire for a non-committed relationship with less responsibility. ... A Guide to Dreams and Sleep Experiences
To dream of having a husband when you are single points to relationships in general. Most girls look for their father’s personality or traits while choosing their life partners. Those traits often represent the male side of a girl’s character. All this is represented when a girl dreams of a husband with all those traits she admires or dreads.... Dream Symbols and Analysis
If you are an unmarried man dreaming of being a husband, then you are processing your aspirations/hopes/fears of one day being married.
If you are a married man, then this dream can represent your assimilation of the pressure of being the breadwinner.
If you are a married woman, this can also be your assimilation of your idealized husband versus the day to day reality, expectations and demands that you have of your actual husband.
If you are an unmarried woman, this dream may be your hope, fantasy, or “dream” of what your future husband will be.... Strangest Dream Explanations
If you dream of your real-life husband, your dream represents your emotions around this relationship. Look up other symbols, or feelings you had, in the dream for further meaning.... My Dream Interpretation
If doubts about validity and intimacy are not properly resolved in her waking life, they will appear in dreams about the loss or death of her husband. They may also be projected onto other women’s husbands in dreams.
If your husband goes missing in your dream or you can’t find him while out with him, your unconscious may be referring to the well-known statistic that most men die before women.
If your husband is dead in both your dream and in your waking life, this refers to the memories you have shared with him.
If another woman’s husband appears, this may refer to a desire for a relationship outside your current one.
If you are having sex with your husband in your dream, this can be a wonderful indicator of how you are feeling about your sexual and emotional relationship with him.
If your first husband appears in your dreams, this represents nostalgia for the past, or more obliquely, competition for your current husband. See also Gay relationships in RELATIONSHIPS.... The Element Encyclopedia
If her doubts and fears about validity are not properly expressed, they will surface in dreams about the loss, or death, of her husband. Such fears may also be projected onto other women’s husbands, almost as though her own husband is too close to her.... Dream Meanings of Versatile
If you have a stepfamily in your waking life, the people who make up that family represent character aspects of your personality and also reflect the primary relationship that connects that stepfamily to you. Such a dream may be reflecting both your own consciousness as well as the waking-life interactions of the individuals involved.
(See Family Members.) ... Complete Dictionary of Dreams
The same dream could mean that either she will benefit from the good qualities of her husband or he will benefit from her good qualities.... Islamic Dream Interpretation